It was about 7pm and the sun had gone down earlier than usual. It was summer, but it was already dark. My thoughts were however darker than the night!
Sitting by me on the white sandy beach of the Atlantic Ocean was Ruth, one of my most favourite people in the world. We were both quiet as we stared ahead into the sea of nothingness before us. The lights of some Boats flashed in the distance as stars danced over the waters of the Atlantic.
I hadn’t spoken with Ruth face to face in about a year. Then out of the blues she called about a week ago and asked if we could have lunch. I agreed but it turned out to be a late lunch because I couldn’t get away from my other engagements.
After Lunch, we decided to take a walk on the sandy Beach and fifteen minutes later my mood took a dive, mirroring the night around us.
I’d known Ruth for some six years and from the day I met her, I was impressed. This was a young lady that had her head screwed right. As far as Love relationships were concerned, she set her standards really high and prayed about the kind of guy she wanted. I was sure she was going to hook up with a fantastic guy and settle down to a marriage made in heaven.
You can understand my devastation when Ruth announced that she had gotten married and was now separated within that one year.
“I can’t believe what you’ve just told me. You knew what you wanted in a man and you weren’t going to compromise. What happened?’
I could hear the tears in Ruth’s voice as she responded.
“I set my standards but after waiting for six years and the right guy didn’t show up, I thought maybe I had set my standards too high”
It was getting chilly and I hung my jacket across her shoulders. She was shivering all over.
“I knew Tolu wasn’t right for me from the first day we met, but hey, I was tired of waiting for Mr. Right. He seemed okay, but there was this nagging feeling that I couldn’t place. I had an uneasy feeling every time we spoke about marriage”
“So what happened?” I asked, urging her on.
“I found out later that he wasn’t really that committed to Jesus. He had just started attending church when we met and I knew many of his friends in church. I guess I made a lot of assumptions. To be honest with you, now, I really doubt if he ever got converted!”
I still couldn’t believe it. “Didn’t you go for pre-marital counseling?”
Ruth stopped to look at me. “We went for counseling but I guess none of us, including the Pastors could see through him. He had the right lingo, the right scriptures, the right Bible…… He was good”
“I’m so sorry.” I consoled her “How long were you in courtship?”
“Four months, but he was so nice while we were courting. Sometimes I wonder if he came to church just to entrap me”
This was sounding like something from the movies. “But why didn’t you come to see me or even call me?
“I avoided you because I knew you wouldn’t approve of him. I knew the relationship would be over the minute you set eyes on him, I couldn’t talk to you about him”
I shook my head in disbelief.
She continued. “At first, he said the church services were too long. Then he said I was becoming a fanatic. Finally, he stopped going to church and forbade me from going to church too. He threatened to deal with me if I as much as sent a text message to anyone from church!”
“It was sheer hell, but I obeyed him. Yesterday morning, he woke up and started packing all my stuff. Before I knew it, I was out on the streets. Just like that”
By now Ruth was weeping uncontrollably. But there was nothing I could say to really console her. We both knew where she went wrong. She should have waited for the guy she prayed for. She shouldn’t have compromised when he hadn’t shown up on time.
You see, in every child of God, there is always a warning signal whenever we are about to make a terrible mistake. Sometimes, it’s the absence of peace. If you are about to take a step and you feel troubled, don’t go ahead. Most of the time, it is a warning that you could be making a terrible mistake.
Ruth had the warning signs but she couldn’t wait. But here she was now, back to square one.
Sometimes, when we pray, we have to wait till the answer comes, even if it takes forever!